i received a very shocking news today, and surprisingly i cant even shed a single tear, its just my heart beats faster everytime i think of her. all i can think of is why? why and WHY? why did she has to be so desperate? why cant she wait, why can't she put her life and destiny onto God's hand? Why did she decided to leave us, and chose him? Why? why oh why if i may ask. If you see this post, you may wonder why is it so heartbreaking for me to watch you let go of our hands, and decided to live your own brand new life, without us inside. well, read this one will you? read this until the very end, this maybe the only chance for me to change your mind, and if you stay with your decision after this, i have to say goodbye to you because its never gonna be the same again after this, no its not the same anymore.
Back when im still a little girl and throughout my school years, you have been my idol since forever. i studied hard just to enter the university, just like you did. i always worked so hard just to be like you. for me, youlike you are an independent woman, a free spirit and has her own way of living her life. when you gave me a few advices about my studies and about boyfriends, i'd listen carefully. Why? Because i want to live up my life based on you, i want to be great just like you did in your life. You have your outstanding career, you have your own money, your own victorious life any girl would die to have. When i walked with you down the streets, i would be so proud, im so proud to have you as my idol, im so proud to have someone like you to teach me about life and everything about girls stuff.
now i ask you, what would you do if one day someone ripped those apart from you, left you with nothing but dark clouds and never ending sorrow? You dont have anyone to hold on to. That was what it feels like, and suddenly everything that you told me, was a lie. you teach me everything about life, and one day you took it back, and im just like a blind person with no stick to hold on to, with nothing to hold on to. how could you? is it true you're leaving us soon? is it true? and what hurts the most is you rather hold his hands and leave, left us with broken hearted, broken down by you. i hope you know what a mess you've done here, and if you really wanted to go, please look at us for the last time, please look at your parents for the last time before you leave us forever. you told me, nothings going to change between us, that you will always be the old you and the bond between us cant be broken but im telling you it already has, its never going to be the same again between us. before this i would be so proud and happy if you can talk to me about life, teach me anything and tell me everything about what you did and your experience in life. but after this, i may never want to look at you again, i may hate you and just by looking at you is enough to make me feel disgusted.
So, if you still want to leave us, its up to you. i'm in no position to tell you what to do, and i have no right to interfere with your life. i know that. im just telling you what my heart wants to say. before i wave goodbye to you, i hope you know that you use to have a very special image in my heart, because you are my idol. now you are one step away from breaking the image and it will be gone, forever. Think about what i've said. please dont leave, please just stay.
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